Thats interesting; on one hand I could always revert, if per say I were to acheive some inkling of the dormant potential. Perhaps, if some someday occurs I'll occasionally go on vacation in the slums. Ground myself in the tactile reality.
You can't enjoy your season of normalicy without the reminders. The insecurity is what makes us human in some fractional way. Is it really healthy to have the guarantees. Is it realistic to assume you're going to reach some fabled plateau? Some fount of intrinsic understanding (mind you I didn't say acceptance). In some fashion if I do make my way to even keel I'll only regret that I didn't have a harder time of it and I'll feel disabled in comparison.
You see I've divorced from the normal humanity to such an extent that even the language of native precidence seems cheap. I don't necessarily aspire for the semblance. If there's any honest endeavor I can pursue perhaps I'll be able to aquire to re invent. I want to create a knowledge without tentacles. I want in some fashion to build the vacuum.
The world has never translated. I don't comprehend the needs I understand though. Anything I attempt will to some extent be intentionally deceptive . Even if it's cathartic in honesty.
Yes, I'm proud of the little greed I achieve. My world is revisionist, thats honest.
In my perspective vanity is honesty.
So is compassion and sympathy.
I realise the dark pastures necessitate the light.
peace, war, empathy
R O M a n
There my latest private email.
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